Thursday, 31 August 2017


It is September 2017; changes are happening in my life this year, not just with the myeloma, but in my personal life as well. I have been in business now for 43 years and through the ups and downs of myeloma I have worked. Work kept me focused and stopped me feeling sorry for myself. This year I decided to retire; this is a decision that was a long time in the making. In my 'human design' this is the story of my life, decision making is not a rapid process. It takes me a long time to work things out, but as a projector and a triple split, when the decision is made it is done. When I get something in my mind whether it be in decision making or in learning I really have it worked out and it is right for me. It has not failed me so far in my life. I have a powerful survival instinct and when something feels right, it is right. Human Design is worth looking up. At 67 I am ready for a new direction.

Myeloma is not something I fear, it never has been if you look back on my posts. It took me most of my life to work out what life is all about, where we come from and where we go when we die. My life experiences confirm my beliefs and I have no fear of death or cancer. After 19 years with mm I am a bit of an enigma to my doctors.

My latest results... Para-protein (my original cancer) has not returned and is too small to count. Kappa light chains are in the normal range and my blood bio-chemical profile is completely normal. I have no pains and no symptoms of multiple myeloma. 8 years ago I dropped my guard, doubted my beliefs and suffered depression. 3 years ago I could hardly walk, my spine was collapsing, I was so ill, and this was the result of wrong thinking, erosion of my beliefs (which I have written a blog about) this cancer morphed and bit me hard. I took treatment to knock it back but did things to reduce their effects and made it all work for me. I had succumbed to depression and allowed it in and it almost destroyed me, but I got on top of it all. Tough lesson but I learned. The one thing I did not lose my belief in was that my pra-protein would not return and to date, it has not. My consultant had thrown me a curved ball, telling me in 2009 that my cancer would return, it threw me into doubt and allowed Kappa light chains to surface. That consultant is history.

One of the hardest things to achieve in this world is to look beyond our conditioning which is drilled into our minds from an early age. Religion, history, science, ways of living, doctors and medicine. The list is endless. We believe our learning of the place we are born and generally do not question what we have learned and who we are told we are. None of us are encouraged to look 'outside the box'. Those who do are subject to ridicule. Strong beliefs make other people of differing beliefs wrong! This simple statement has killed billions of people over the centuries and even in this 'modern' world, is still doing it. The modern world has just given us more sophisticated ways to kill in the name of belief. What if every person on this planet was a brother or sister? We are not supposed to know this but it is true. Conditioning is control for the 1%, think about it, we are led like we are sheep and most allow it ; I am not that way. I am not frightened to put my head above the parapet.

I am not a victim of my conditioning! If I was, I would probably not have survived the attack of Multiple Myeloma. Matter is a product of energy, we are energy, cancer is energy. Our minds direct energy in thought and body functional control. It is said...When the mind is right, the body is right. This is partially correct, deeper than the mind we find our beliefs, our beliefs are a product of conditioning. (When you are ill, you go to the doctor, cancer kills, if the doctor cannot heal you, you will not get better, etc etc) Beliefs can kill or cure. Our bodies are bio-electric energy, the body you see is vibrating energy, 99.9999999999993% empty space, although it looks solid, according to science it is certainly not. This may change your belief in what you are...there is so much more I have learned. Who you are is a completely different ball game, where you came from and where you go when you die is mind blowing. Question everything, that's my motto.

Peace and love

Thursday, 16 March 2017


I seem to have this relationship with multiple myeloma, it bites hard as most of you reading my blog know. I have always said that belief is vital, belief in you and belief in your healing ability. Knowing who you are and importantly what you are not, is key. If you believe in your mind, your fears and only trust doctors and medicine, oh dear, this is so dangerous...Obviously this is my opinion.
Before I continue I must give you my latest medical result. This is my 19th year following diagnosis. Para-protein has gone, Kappa light chains down to 15 and in the range of normal, Bone lesions appear dormant, blood biochemical profile completely normal, tumour in left lung, gone. Phew, my doctors are amazed. I was asked before leaving the hospital on Tuesday if they could do some further research on my blood, which might be something to do with what I told the doctor when I was getting my results.
I have been taking Revlimid 25mg and Dexamethasone for 7 months, I took this following a transplant that did not work and when I dowsed them the result was good, this result is good for my belief system because I can make it work for me. I told my doctor that my additional regime was to use sodium bicarbonate (yes, baking soda but without the aluminium additive, this is important) I was not surprised that he had not heard of this treatment and why should he when he is schooled by big pharma. Anyway he was interested and wrote it down. It is interesting to note that sodium bicarbonate kills cancer. Inject it into a tumour and the tumour dies. Take it orally into your body and it will alkalize it and when it enters the blood stream it will kill cancer cells. Of course you should carefully monitor alkalinity daily to make sure you do not overdo it as too much alkalinity can be dangerous. Cancer creates its own acid environment and hates alkalinity. I take mine every morning on rising, one level teaspoon in a tumbler of water with a squeezed lemon and usually at night before eating. Do not take it on a full stomach and always do the research before taking it. The beauty of taking it for me has been taking away most of the side effects of chemo without altering what it does in any way. An important side effect of taking sodium bicarbonate for me has been the elimination of asthma problems and increase of my lung peak flow of cleans the lungs.
I also bought a sauna; not steam but an electric Far Infra Red dry sauna. (Sahara Valley)Far infra red because it passes infra red frequencies through a carbon catalyst which alters the frequency to a level that is beneficial to our cells. Heating cells is interesting because heat and cancer do not go together. Cancer actually has a weak hold on the body and heating your core temperature to about 43 degrees (hyperthermia) weakens cancer and in Germany it is used as a cancer therapy with weak chemo which lessens the effects of chemo on the body. However, I bought one to heat up my spine, it takes medical help to raise core temperature safely, keeping the brain cool. My sauna penetrates my body about 3" which is enough for me to heat my bones and cause trouble to my lesions. Hooray it is working.
I also take vitamin D daily 5000mg with added vitamin K which helps it work.
My belief system is supercharged, so cancer really has no chance. Our own immune systems are really quite capable of dealing with illness and cancer if we let it. I have always said in my blogs that fear is cancer's greatest friend. Mind belief is weak and is driven by circumstance. When things are good we feel strong, when things go bad we are projected into fear...bad. Real deep belief does not change when things go bad, this is where I have my greatest strength. When I lost that belief as I reported in my blog due to depression and negative doctor comments, things really went bad for me. thankfully I threw it off eventually but damage was done. Now, thankfully I am cancer free and now in my 19th year I have proved that MM can be beaten.
If you know anyone with a tumour look up the research done by Tullio Simonccini, an Italian doctor who cured hundreds of cancer patients with sodium bicarbonate and was struck off and his documented research ignored because he used a non standard treatment not approved by big pharma. Shameful. How it works... Bicarb mixed with a sugar (molasses or maple syrup) and water the sugar absorbs the bicarb and when it enters the blood stream it is greedily taken into the cancer cells. The sugar acts as a trojan horse and releases the bicarb into the cells and kills them. Again, do the research, doctors do not know about this and big pharma definitely do not want you to know. It is time we changed the power of a medical regime that kills so many people unnecessarily when non harming treatments are available.
I am looking towards retirement now I am 67 and many years cancer free.


Sunday, 25 December 2016


Two years ago I was in so much pain, I had lesions on my bones, a tumour in my lung. I could barely function, getting out of bed was so painful. I had refused medical treatment hoping that I could clear this on my own. My belief was at a low ebb, I dumped my Oncologist for another with more open views.
This Christmas day I am pain free, I have no problems with my bones and my tumour has disappeared. I had decided that treatment was my only option and however badly I thought of medical intervention I would have to make it work for me. I lost faith and paid the price. I now have it back and together with my new Oncologist have beaten MM back to almost nothing. I am fit and well, no pain, kappa currently at 35 and still reducing, I am still working full time. I am beginning my 19th year of my relationship with MM. I have said it before: I believe in life, I believe we have power over cancer and illness. My change in thinking is that sometimes we cannot do this alone, sometimes we need help and 16 years after my first treatment I gave in to medical help. Medicine and me have now beaten MM into submission, my belief is back to full strength.
My original MM was para-protein this was cured and has not returned. I am now looking towards a cure for Kappa levels. Who knows what could be next, I am told MM is incurable. It may be, but I believe we can do much personally to keep it at bay; if you read my blogs you know what I believe.
I wish you all a happy Christmas and a healthy New Year.


Tuesday, 1 November 2016


My latest trip to my Oncologist was interesting to say the least. My kappa levels have dropped to almost zero. My paraprotein levels are too small to count. That's a result.

The one thing I know about chemotherapy is that it is poison. I had a terrible time last year but knew instinctively that it was not working on me. My transplant was total hell and I was worse after it than before. I resisted it; maybe that is the reason. This year I make it work for me.

I trained 15 years ago as an energy healer, I am also a dowser. Both modalities utilise energy. As a dowser I can read earth energies to heal sick houses and as a healer, can balance the energy of a sick person. All of my dowsing is done remotely, all I need is a link to tune in to. I haven't done much energy healing of late because I have been so ill. This year I have made a concerted effort to make myself well again.

As I move into my nineteenth year with my passenger, multiple myeloma, I am now stable with no symptoms of it. It bites me every now and again, but I always bite back. I don't fear it, I certainly don't believe it will kill me. MM to me is just an energy which is the basis of everything. There is not much you or anywhere. Science knows this. Energy can be transformed but never destroyed.

I am a slave to my life and never to multiple myeloma. What do you believe?


Wednesday, 19 October 2016


I would just like to say thank you to the many thousands of you who have visited my blog about my journey with Multiple Myeloma. It is now 18 years since my original diagnosis, I am 66 years old and work full time in a job that I love, it is my Company and I do administration and also some of the physical, hard work. Currently I am well and fit for my age, despite multiple myeloma that sometimes bites me, but I always bite back. MM I suppose is travelling with me, but I give it little thought and certainly, it does not generate any fear in my thinking. My Consultant Physician tells me with some surprise in his voice that I am asymptomatic... Eh, I said, what's that mean? He tells me that, although I have MM I do not display any of the symptoms or pain normally associated with this disease. He he I responded, then I must be doing something right that you do not understand. How can he, his whole career revolves around cut, burn and poison! It is sad really that medicine has no idea of who we are beyond their thinking that the human body is a really clever physical machine. That is not my thinking at all. Some interesting facts are maybe necessary at this point.
The human body is made up of cells, some of these cells are our own but about 40% of them are bacterial cells that we carry as passengers. A cell is made up of atoms, which are the building blocks of everything in us, our world and our universe. Each cell is composed of 100 trillion atoms and it is estimated that the human body is comprised of 60 to 100 trillion cells. Cells differ in size but as a generalisation it will suffice for my point. Here is the kicker... An atom is 99.9999999999999% empty space. The nucleus of each atom contains all the mass, and is surrounded by orbiting electrons. Between the electrons and the nucleus there is nothing but empty space. To give some perspective on this; if the nucleus of the atom was the size of your thumb nail, the orbiting electrons would be a quarter of a mile away. Years ago this made me think and I concluded that if the atoms that make up our cells and the cells that make up our bodies follow that huge percentage of emptiness, what are we. Over 99% of our bodies are comprised of just six elements, the largest is Oxygen at 65%, Carbon at 18.6%, Hydrogen at 9.7, Nitrogen at 8.2%, Calcium at 1.8%, Phosphorous at 1.0%, beyond which are many trace elements. Sorry about the factoids but they are important. Look in the mirror, what do you see, you don't see Oxygen and you don't see hydrogen but the two make water but water is 75% of you. What looks back at you is more than just chemical elements, but as the atom is, so you are 99.9999999999999 empty space. Scientifically the total amount of mass in the human body is so small that you would need a microscope to see it. Interestingly, and also a scientific fact, if you took all the physical matter from 7 billion people on this world, you would get a mass the size of a sugar lump. It is said that we are empty people living on an empty world in an empty universe. (physically)
We are not just clever machines, something makes this whole thing work and that something is not of this world, this is my conclusion. We exist, we think, we look solid, we create, we love, we hate and live from birth to death and never try to understand who and what we are and more importantly, where we came from. The greatest human mystery of all time, and something I have been keen to discover all my life. Our mass of chemical elements work in a beautiful symbiosis following the blueprint of our own personal DNA profile. This profile is very similar to the profile of every living creature on this planet and the final base pairs define us a humans. We, in turn have the capacity to create and this is not given to any other living creature. This is how we have created our technology from a world we inhabit that was once grass and trees. There is something special about us, we operate with bio-electric energy, this energy is conscious and aware, it exists on more than one level. The level we know is the mind and the mind is all encompassing and has little time for anything that does not exist in the past or our futures. I have learned that the bit we always miss is the moment of now, because everything happens in the moment of now. The future is possibility, the past is gone, neither have any relevance, especially if we are struck with an incurable illness. What I know has kept me alive for 18 years and will continue to do so. Beneath the mind we have a belief system, this system carries powerful energy, what we believe comes true, although there are limitations to this, we can believe we will win the lottery, but beneath that we know that the odds are not in our favour and we never do. I believe I will not die of cancer, this is a deep belief and kept me cancer free for many years until my consultant negatively affected my belief. He is no longer my consultant. I am human and do suffer from mind traits, one of which was a deep depression that allowed my cancer to morph and bite me. It was a bad time and it has taken me a while to reconnect with my belief and am now on the road to beating mm down once more. I will do this.
Let me just explain that the energy element that is who we are exists on several levels, the greater part of who we are we call the soul, we are an aspect of that soul and this greater part is never born to this world, instead, a small portion of it is born here as me and you. The soul journeys with us as it is part of us and is indestructible as we are. The soul is immensely powerful and we have a small part of that power, the power to live, love and create. We can create our heaven on earth or our hell on earth, this is our choice and our soul will not intervene. It actually talks to us, not in words, but in feelings, we call it our sixth sense. I believe that mm is an energy, it has no mass but as an energy it can interact with our cells and damage our DNA, in the most part, taking us to death. Energy can never be created or destroyed and the energy in us, our world and our universe exists to the same degree as it always has done, neither increasing or decreasing. However, it can be transformed but never losing or gaining. When we have a physical injury, we heal, we can smash our bodies and we heal, we know this and we believe it, our mind never believe we will not heal. This is deep belief which has great power. When we have cancer or another serious illness we immediately believe we are going to die, or doctors might say that we may have six months to live. To our belief system we have just been given the sentence of death. Cancer treatment is indiscriminate poison, it treats symptoms and not cause and damages our capacity to heal, many people die of the treatment and not the cancer. I will take chemo but as an aid to the symptoms while I attack the cause by opening my toolbox of faith and connection with my higher self, (soul) not through fear and loathing of my cancer but through love and positivity, never fearing the cancer, and seeing my future me, many years ahead and utilising the unconditional love and energy of my soul to effect a transformation of the energy of my cancer using my heart connection (not mind) to my soul.
There is much information on the internet about self healing and connection to soul to effect healing, many people look upon this as woo woo, doctors know nothing of it and continue to cut, poison and burn because it is all they have in their toolbox. We, on the other hand, can create our heaven or our hell as we journey into cancer, what we believe will define our lives to continue or not, we decide because we create it.
I know this is a long blog and there is much to take in. For many it is a step too far, it works for me.
It is said that there are many roads up the mountain, but we all end up in the same place, eventually. We exist now in the fourth dimension but have part of us in invisible realms because we are consciousness; invisible energy, we, as humans exist on this world, being a small aspect of our soul clothed in physical matter. when we die an our consciousness moves out of our body, we return to or souls enlightened by our physical experience and our bodies liquefy and return to the earth where it all once belonged. To die is certainly not the worst thing that can happen to us, the worst thing is not knowing who we are.

Sunday, 14 February 2016


Those of you who know me will know that I was diagnosed with MM early in 1999 with high levels of para-protein IgA kappa. Following treatment it returned quickly and then completely disappeared by Jan 2000. It returned as a trace briefly in 2010 and disappeared again one year later without treatment. I was always confident that para-protein was under control and still is to this day as my Oncologist tells me it is too low to count. I did not want to know too much about this cancer, I do not say 'My Cancer' because I do not want to own it or give it energy. All my energy went into belief that I could defy my original 3-5 year prognosis with ongoing treatment. The first treatment was enough for me at the time and I was determined to prove my oncologist wrong. If you read my blogs you will find out what I believe and how I managed for 17 years without any treatment. I changed Hospitals and my Oncologist because my original Oncologist was responsible for putting doubt in my mind, the outcome was my 2010 result after a battle with depression following our conversation a couple of years earlier. I regained most of my belief and the cancer disappeared again by 2011. My mind was a huge influence on me and my blogs will tell you that the mind is weak and our sub conscious beliefs are so powerful. Anyway, I believe it opened the door to something that my Oncologist did not explain, my Kappa levels were rising rapidly. What the hell was Kappa? This was new, my focus was on para-protein. I was blindsided as I was not prepared and could not find it within me to fight, even though my para-protein was under control. Sadly, by the time I realised that I needed help I had lesions in my spine, ribs and hips, I could barely walk and was in so much pain, I even had a tumour in my left lung, I needed morphine just to enable me to function. Once I had met my new Oncologist and he actually listened to me. He was so amazed I had lasted so long without treatment. To cut a long story short, I accepted treatment to allow me time to get my Mojo back. This was akin to being hit with a sledgehammer; many of you will know what I mean.
However, they did not get me full remission and following my transplant my levels had risen. A month after my treatment I made the decision to stop all treatment and medication. 4 months later, here I am, My levels have dropped, all pain has gone apart from a bit neuropathy, which is reducing, and I believe I have my control back. Once again I have no fear, my mojo is certainly back and friends tell me the have not seen me look so well in years. I have decided I will carry on at work, I have a tough job, both mentally and physically but I love it. Happy days, I am certainly here for the long haul.
My advice, never give up, never give in to fear, I did and paid the price, and even though that mountain seems unassailable, it is still possible to get to the top where the view is so much better. Belief and faith in ourselves holds awesome power, but it works both ways. You have it all, you were born with it, if you look to your mind or outside of yourself, you will not find it. The mind can only come up with fear, the true self, the eternal loving energy that came to our Earth School deep within you is yearning to be recognised, and in the recognition you find the faith in you as the healer. As Jesus said "I did not heal you, YOUR FAITH DID." This is a lesson for us all - and I am not religious. Why is in my posts.

Sunday, 4 October 2015


I am now in my 17th year following my diagnosis of Multiple Myeloma.
This has been a tough year for me and I will update my blog when I retire from work. I have had to take some treatment due to the severity of the attack. Inappropriate comments from my Oncologist made me doubt my ability to keep this cancer at bay and it bit me when I was down.
I am back in the land of the living now; that Oncologist is history and I have another who respects my views. He has not met anyone who has survived so long without treatment and admitted "we are breaking new ground here." I have my mojo back and am repairing the damage that was done to me.
I am stronger and wiser now and am preparing for a long and happy life. I have no fear of MM.